WhatNever?! Not your routine traffic stop

Posted: January 31, 2011 in What?Never!

"Officer, I swear I didn't tweet it!"

By Kim DeRaedt

It’s like taking candy from a baby.  In other words, it sure is difficult to feel sorry for these players who were slapped with fines after utterly foolish comments and behaviors.

Players violated club/league policy etc. received/paid fine but not in way would’ve thought

Po-Po poooolice!
Simply stated:  What were these guys thinking?
Not only are blowout games boring for the fans, but Burnley midfielder Kevin McDonald shows us that players feel the same way too.  McDonald was subbed out at halftime with his team up 5-0 over Manchester City.  We friends and family in town, he did what any Englishman would want to do:  He hit up the bar five minutes away
to watch his own game. 
Players in Brazil know all too much about fines and not exactly millionaires, most try to avoid them.  So when Botafogo midfielder Somalia realized he was going to be late to training and fined, he made up a story about his own kidnapping and relayed to Rio de Janeiro police that he had been held captive for two hours.  However, video camera footage and self-contradicting statements revealed his fib.  Poor guy!  No wonder he lied.  Botafogo players are typically docked 40% of their pay for tardiness.  On top of that, Somalia now faced legal woes for falsely reporting a crime.  (They say you can now hear his alarm clock 2 miles away!  Just kidding.) 

A tweet is worth a thousand troubles
“And they call him one of the best referees.  That’s a joke.” (Plus, he posted a link of a doctored picture of the referee, Howard Webb.) 
Guilty party:  Ryan Babel, Liverpool 
Fine:  $16,000
“Apologize to all of you.  I showed up late.  Made a big mistake.  I’m very very sorry.”
Guilty party:  Jozy Altidore, Hull City
Unsympathetic manager:  Phil Brown, who thought Altidore’s tardiness to the team’s match against Portsmouth was “information that stays in house.  The reason he wasn’t on the bench was our business.”

“Naz so free dumb”
(Get it?^)
Perhaps Sparta Prague midfielder Pavel Horvath should read up on both history and cultural quirks if he wants to avoid another faux pas and $9,000 fine in the Czech Republic.  Horvath was hit was the punishment after he twice saluted fans with his right arm outstretched seconds before the conclusion of the team’s match against Viktoria Zizkov.  A disciplinary committee deemed Horvath was “giving Nazi salutes.”
DC United President Kevin Payne was docked $5,000 for speaking his mind, or maybe for telling the cold honest truth, to The Washington Post.  Payne said, “We don’t want to play like Colorado or New England, which most of the season sat with eight or nine guys behind the ball. How many people go to watch Colorado or New England play? That’s a problem for our league. We can’t play like we’re a team desperately trying to remain in 14th place in the Premiership. Our market isn’t there yet. They want to see something that is entertaining, and DC United has always had a way of playing. Given a choice, we would rather attack than cynically defend.”
The crime:  Clearly, Payne’s comments were “detrimental to the public image of the League.”

“But officer…” nothing.  Soccer’s “green” ticket makes a red card seem pleasant. 
Advice:  Keep the infractions on the field!  Refs aren’t so bad after all.


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